Debates of March 10, 2005 (day 53)

Thank you, Mr. Speaker. Mr. Speaker, a band called the Bare Naked Ladies sings a song called If I Had a Million Dollars. I’ve always liked the song, Mr. Speaker, so today I have my own version to share with this House.

---Laughter

---Applause

Unfortunately, Mr. Speaker, the rules of this House do not allow guitars or keyboards or even after hearing these backup singers…

---Laughter

…you’ll have to bear with me.

Mr. Speaker, if I had a billion dollars, I would ask the elders’ council what’s best to do. I’ll fund them for their wisdom and their view. I’ll keep the elders in the Sahtu. I wouldn’t ship them south, cause that’s cruel.

---Laughter

If I had billion dollars, I’d speed up the chipsealing programs so the elders can greet you.

If I had a billion dollars, I’ll contribute to the Chief T’Selehye and Chief Albert Wright schools, install water and sewer facilities in Colville too.

---Laughter

If I had a billion dollars, we’d build log houses, affordable housing so we wouldn’t have to live 10 people to a house, cause that’ll cause a health issue to you.

Mr. Speaker, if I had a billion dollars, I’d buy an all-weather road to wrap around the Sahtu and then I’d buy a sack of potatoes cause I can finally afford to share them with me and you.

Hear! Hear!

---Laughter

Then I’ll clean up the contaminated mountain in Tulita while I’m at it too, because that would be cool.

Mr. Speaker, if I had a billion dollars, I’d build a Mackenzie Valley office in the Sahtu. Cabinet could help with Inuvik too.

But if I had a billion dollars, I’d fund the treatment centres so we can all get well and if we could learn to build it ourselves, wouldn’t that be swell.

Mr. Speaker, if I had a billion dollars, I’d get energy from the Bear, no more diesel generators, hydro is the way to go.

Hear! Hear!

---Applause

If I had a billion dollars, I’d host the International Dene Gathering in the Sahtu. I’d invite all my friends, and the Premier can come too.

---Laughter

Whoa.

If I had a billion dollars, I wouldn’t forget the arts and crafts. Artists need raw materials and supplies and they need them fast because in Yellowknife tourism is getting to critical mass.

If I had a billion dollars, I’d support the trappers and their traditional lifestyle by buying everyone a fur coat, and that really isn’t cruel. I’m not just thinking about the Sahtu, I’d buy for all the MLAs and their communities.

---Applause

Hey, hey.

If I had a billion dollars, I’d give Nahanni a real gym.

---Applause

Ho ho ho.

Cause they don’t have one yet, and Granny needs to dunk basketballs too.

---Laughter

And Dene K’onia staff would stay in Hay River and feed their children too. If I had a billion dollars, I’d build new courthouses in all the NWT communities.

---Laughter

Whoa, no way!

Mr. Speaker, if I had a billion dollars, we’d all be rich. Mahsi.

---Applause

Alright.

---Applause

Thank you, Mr. Yakeleya. Your Speaker is certainly glad that this could be the last day.

---Laughter